V/vm

Go to any art gallery or museum, and you can expect to hear the sound of silence, maybe a cough or two, and the sound of the art students pontificating on how important the piece of string dipped in marmalade is, in relation to the current state of world affairs.

If you happened to go to London’s Victoria and Albert Museum on August 31st though, instead of the pondering of the relevance of sculptured elephants, you would have heard V/vm, Stockport’s finest mainstream manipulation team giving sinister sounds to beautiful surroundings.

Picture the scene.
High ceilings, roman pillars with intricate carvings, stained glass windows, mosaic floor, horrified children, cabbage, a sheep with a pig’s head, the art elite, smashed love hearts and the desecrated face of Shaking Stevens.

If Modern Art is rubbish then rubbish is modern art. And V/vm are striving to be the worst of the rubbish, therefore inadvertently becoming top of the height of what the puritans call ‘Art’

Playing a new set, kicking of with the abysmal Atomic Kitten’s ‘Whole Again’, V/vm’s set showed a cooler than thou audience how pop music for what it really is. Soul destroying mindless waste.

Churning up 'Come on Eileen', Fucking up Madonna, spitting out ‘Take That’, so many of the coolest faces in London were reduced to the scared confused faces of those who are forced into hearing these songs in their original format every time they go shopping. V/vm don’t play live often. Too dangerous maybe, what with the destruction to the venue, the fans nerves and their physical selves.

It was joyous to see, and it deserved to have been photographed for a forthcoming exhibition, which could be named ‘The Unintentional and accidental transmogrification of happiness to realization’