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Chris TT vs Kev Kharas: "custard-thick substandard shit-stick"
Posted: 15 Jul '08, 11:27
It’s only just come to our attention that Xtra Mile-signed songwriter sort Chris TT has been offering our own Kev Kharas out for a bit of a knock-about. Yes, we’re slow. But this is fun. So here it is.
Kev’s never one to mince his words, so when reviewing a recent single by Luke Leighfield he remarked:
“Still struggling to find justification for the tepid vocals, ‘comedy’ metal solo and lame keys, all I can muster is that Luke Leighfield remains the single most convincing reason to date why people like Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly, Chris T-T and Scouting For Girls should be bound and gagged, sat in front of a mirror and made to watch as the oxygen slowly emigrates from their lungs.”
To which Mr TT wrote on his blog, on July 5 (and after some lovely positive comments about DiS, we should note):
“In a (really harsh) review of Luke Leighfield’s single, reviewer KK (who the fuck?) mentions me in passing, alongside Get Cape and - deep breath - pause to load up a big fat shotgun - Scouting For Fucking Girls! Obviously there’s a nasty (quite funny actually) description as well: he wants us to die (suffocating, tied up in front of a mirror I think). But that’s not important. This is important: Scouting For Girls? SCOUTING FOR CLUMPING UBER REPETITIVE INANE DUMBO PIANO BASHING DOFF-DOFF-DOFF FUCKTARDERY GIRLS!?
“So. I know it’s unprofessional but I’m calling you out, ‘KK’, you custard-thick substandard shit-stick of a hack you… you’re not too big or too old for me to put you over my knee and give you a good hard thrashing. I’m serious. If I learn who you are, and we’re in the same room or field, and you don’t surround yourself with muscle very fast, I’m going to give you a spanking, my friend. Bare arse and everything. No belts or paddles, but you’ll pray you weren’t born. The relentless teethgrinding trite-city that is S******* F** G***s? I tell you, you’ll be wishing you’d never even typed their name out so close to mine, as your tearful friends rub antiseptic cream into your aching butt-cheeks. You are fuckked.”
If Mr TT would be up for getting down to the Linford Christie Sports Centre on July 27, he’ll find Kharas scampering about in his short-shorts for the second annual BSM 5-A-Side tournament. As beaten finalists last year, DiS is hopeful of going one better this time around. With or without a potentially TT-battered Kharas. Bring the pain.
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he meant to say
as your GLEEFUL friends rub antiseptic cream into your aching butt-cheeks.
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Should I be embarassed
that I've never even heard of Chris T-T?
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Not really, he's not exactly on a regular fixture
in the mass media!
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fuck yes
.
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This reminds me of Kerrang! circa 2001
where the singer of nickleback had a long running feud with one of the writers. he later sent him some flowers.
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This is one of the funniest things
I have read in quite some time.
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Much as I like Kev Kharas
Chris T-T rules. At Truck 2002, I was there with a film crew making a film about the festival, and Chris agreed to do an acoustic set in the fields behind the Truck stage just for us. He was lovely, really friendly, and he's an extremely gifted musician and lyricist. So I'm sticking with him on this one. Plus he's a big lad, so I reckon he'd win a fight anyway!
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he maybe a nice guy but he a talentless cunt
I was at truck 2007 and he was fucking shit.
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I remember that set.......
it wasn't too good.
The thing is, he's a really talented guy and has been absolutely brilliant on the other occasions I've seen him.
I reckon the Truck mainstage is quite hard for any act to sound good on.
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funny
don't you post that exact comment every single time his name is mentioned anywhere?
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I swear you only ever post
to give this guy a knocking. Seriously, in any news story or thread about Chris T-T you can guarantee there's a reply from you somewhere stating how he ruined Truck 2007 for you. Why the fuck did you stand there and watch him?!
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Yeah
I thought he was alright at Truck. Some of his songs are a bit hit and miss but he's hardly a 'talentless cunt'.
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I guess there are just some things
that make you so mad, you just can't let them go, and Chris TT's Truck 2007 performance is one of them. It still makes me mad!! Given that this is one of the only forums where Chris TT's work is discussed, then you have to expect people putting forward their two penneth even if, shock, horror it is contentious. Oh look, here I am again as well! (Pops back in shell).
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I think it's a pity
that you and fid got so obsessed &couldn't leave it alone - it's obvious, given the postponement and having no band and his fitting in the set in the middle of a folk tour, that something was a bit fucked.
I for one am gutted he's not doing Truck this year.
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Snap!
In fact, I only read down this far to see if ol' fiddy had posted. 'Fraid I'm with Chris on this one...
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It really annoys me when reviewers seem to think
That wishing death on musicians is some how big and funny and makes them look cool.
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^this
It just makes them look incapable of actually writing a review.
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would it be out of order to actually want this to happen?
I like reading Kev's stuff, almost all of the writers on this site infact, apart from one, whose name escapes me but who clearly doesn't even listen to the stuff he reviews. Anyway, it's all harmless fun, but i remember that Luke Leighfield review being overly harsh. Yes, he's not that great, but he's okay, and it's all quite light-hearted, and being a performer in the public eye he's there to be shot down sometimes, but writers shouldn't absolutely berate people. If that record, or any others are so bad then just don't review them, or do review them without making them too personal. I've forgot what i was saying really, but fight, FIGHT.
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Kev "do a Radiohead" Kharas?
Bring the pain.
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oh dear
pointless sniping at each other!
twenty paces turn and fire and with a bit of luck they'll take each other out.-
One journalist who used to write for DiS
once started a thread about my old band with the heading, "Why is Seymour Glass still alive?".
We're friends now.
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"Additional words: Kev Kharas, Mike Diver, Samuel Strang"
Chris "Can't Read" TT
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He initialled the review, you dufflebag.
Chris 'Can't Read' Alcxxk.
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what are you talking about?
the pieces are initialled, in reference to the bit at the top, which explains with the initials stand for, stefan "can't read" applebuyer
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and chris tt's main thing
seems to be that he's being cowardly, hiding behind an alias as "kk" whilst he's using his real name, but its kk to save space, quite conventionally
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i don't understand
any of what you just wroted.
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I think I get it.
But it's broken my brain.
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apparently
Chris didn't read the single review itself, he read Luke Leighfield's re-posting of it elsewhere, which included the initials but not the full writer names. Once he found out what 'KK' stands for, he posted that as a comment at the bottom of the blog.
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he could've scrolled up
chris 'can't scroll up' bamos.
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Um...
More likely he was pleading overall ignorance of Kev Kharas, abbreviated or otherwise.
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Kev
i think I love you. This man keeps 'political' music in the dark ages.
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But
he's not really a "political" artist, is he? He's done *one* "political/protest" album (which acknowledges its own lack of worth in the final song's first line) on top of a whole back catalogue of songs about hedgehogs, flying giraffes, turkeys with guns and Cliff Richard being nailed to a cross. What's not to like??
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More reason to love Chris
The whole blog entry is amazing. DiS should be feeling pretty pleased with itself, really.
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ha!
I love Chris TT, he's as far from talentless as you can get and as lovely as a warm chocolate cake.
However, I'm totally up for mass DiS fighting, most the people on here could do with a spank from time to time. Who is Mr KK anyway? Why should I care about a bloke one K away from a pointy hat?
TT, if you need anyone to hold your pint while you spank the Dis-scenester, I'm your woman.
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Get out of TT's backside you
Maybe he'll over-earnest KK to death. Or tell him not to fly short haul until his ears bleed.
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sorry...
...doesn't he panic at many discos? Or fall out of enough boys?
Go cut yourself :)
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Thats sooo two years ago
Actually so was my post. Touche!
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Over-earnest?
Have you been listening to Frank Turner by mistake..? Or is your only knowledge of the T-T world the (admittedly one-dimensional) 9 Red Songs, which has very little to do with Chris' main back catalogue?
You can throw many accusations at a man who's penned such hits as Eminem is Gay ("Lipstick all over his chainsaw
Dancing around in dungarees
And did you see where Dr Dre put his hands
When he stood behind him on kids TV?"),
The Headcold Bit Of The Winter("lucozade nurofen benylin lemsip anadin hot milk
n n n n n night nurse"),
Dreaming Of Injured Popstars ("it only took one match to burn down Kelly Jones")
but 'over-earnest' isn't one I'd go for myself...-
I'm talking about
The man himself. Not his music.
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Hey Chris!
How about we add Daniel Ross (the guy who slated my album) into the bout, and I'll join Chris to make it a doubles match. I'm a right terrier in the ring.
DiS vs bland singer songwriters in a fight to the death.
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:D
<3
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Please let this happen ...
... it would be a very different support act for somebody. Don't know how hard Kev Kharas is but I have (very briefly) met Chris T-T and he looks like someone you wouldn't want to mess with.
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For 'mess with'
Read 'Fall on you'.
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Is it only me
who thinks it would be nice to read a genuinely well written and honest review without hyperbole and posturing and satirical witty nonsense? You know explaining why you like or dislike an artist/record without descending into surrealist name checking pseudo-poetic waffle. Can anybody write/think these days?
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Here you are.
Luke Leighfield's new single.
It's pretty dull.
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having never heard Chris T-T, had a quick to youtube
am sure he's very nice and everything, but there's some bad song titles going on: 'A Plague On Both Your Houses'? 'Preaching To The Converted'? It's a bit Mark Lawrenson.
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Get Cape
is as bad as the others mentioned, no? Almost... I havent actually heard Chris TT, he seems to only exist at Truck festival. Im sure he's probably alright actually.
*ends this pointless post*
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idiot, eh?
27 posts, eh?
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...
Does he think he can't be compared to Scouting For Girls? THat's pretty funny.
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why is it funny?
must admit that i didn't understand the chris tt vs Scouting For Girls comparison either. They are completely different. As are SFG and GCWCF. All kk did was pick three artists he didn't like and lump them together, then made a 'funny' comment about them.
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am I the only one who's backing kharas?
maybe while he's spacking you, you could let out a potently smelling little tommy squeaker kev? or just a wet poo?
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spacking?
spanking.
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FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!
Kev could take him... EASEEEEEEEY.
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And
that review was shockingly edited...I actually said much more than that.
Some nice things too.
This has no purpose, really.
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Why?
Why, why why? w-w-w-w-wh-why why?
No class, just end up sounding pompous going on about key changes. No one repects anybody who can't awallow a review, good or bad.
There would be no point fighting Chris TT, he'd just end up pulling you up on your every move and every time you countered one of his punches he'd really try to correct you on it.
He needs to learn to take criticism on board or just ignore it.
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actually
i think he's right, you didn't write this very well, he specifically says he doesn't mind the criticism of the music.
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It would be even worse...
for him to write a post just to criticise the quality of the writing.
That's laughable - he wouldn't do it if it was a good review. Or would he?
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rubbish
Why shouldn't he criticise the quality of the writing, when it's about him (good or bad), when it's in a public domain and the website had a comments box underneath the review just like this one.
He didn't even comment about Kev Kharas here, just wrote a long, really interesting blog post about DiS that included a small joke at the end about hating Scouting For Girls.
He asked for a response from Natalie and she didn't give him one, then pops up here months later moaning about it. That's gutless in my opinion.
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He should have...
contacted her personally, not wrote a petty comment.
OK, if the review was good why would he criticise the writing? because it is in the public domain? It's free advertising, the site could just pull it.
Who is gonna say: "I like the sound of that but the way the review was written... hmmm, nah I won't buy it now"?
natalie doesn't have to answer him.
He did his job: Made the album
She did hers: reviewed it.I applaud her for resisting a reply. It showed integrity. Chris TT was forced to look at the blank space below his comment and think about what he had done.
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I agree
When I looked at the edited version of my review! But there's ways and ways of standing up for yourself...
He hasn't responded to what the other person who commented said either, not really.
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And
I'm not moaning. It's referencing, innit.
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INNIT!
!
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Sorry
I mean Ms. Shaw.
I am not on first name terms!
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Cheers TheTennerYouLost,
I haven't read what's going on here all that well (I'm at work y'see) and will probs have another glance later.
But yeah anyway, I'm in the Kharas corner. Clearly.
Let's not turn me into the third corner of some sort of Bermuda triangle...
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Time constraints
I mean the third ego. It's not about me.
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I raise...
a toast to that.
No problems.
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It actually turns out
I have nothing else to add.
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"our own"
you're not allowed to say that any more, surely?
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i think
i'd fight in the kharas corner
it would be like orwell joining the international brigade
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The thing is
artists like Chris T-T pester reviewers morning, noon and night yet when someone is actually kind enough to bother writing about he throws the toys out of the pram because they're not proclaiming it as the best thing since sliced bread!
Strewth!!!!-
there's a bit of a drastic difference there though, isn't there?
Between 'proclaiming it as the best thing since sliced bread' and saying 'Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly, Chris T-T and Scouting For Girls should be bound and gagged, sat in front of a mirror and made to watch as the oxygen slowly emigrates from their lungs.' in a review that has essentially nothing to do with him.
'yet when someone is actually kind enough to bother writing about'... yeah, well kind.
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agreed
he is like one of those annoying new cross 'unsigned' types who actually managed to get signed.
personally i think his music is nowhere near as good as scouting for girls.
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This is why I love DiS
Half of you have missed the humour, half of you have missed the point. ha!
Get you lot together and it'd be dangerous :D
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Wut humore?
Wut point?!
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your
Face.
My Arse.
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I've seen your arse
It's much nicer than my face.
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this is weird
i keep thinking we're on the carter 4um.
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I keep thinking
we're on your wall. :)
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Shed Seven
Suck eggs.
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it is dangerous
Zonino + Andrew WK = amazing scenes.
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Someone seems to have posted a link to Kev's Facebook account on Chris T-T's blog...
For identification purposes. The plot thickens...
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Unless Kev
has done that himself, and i have a feeling he's got better things to do, thats a little bit out of order of someone to do? Unless its Mike or Sam... they are scamps.
Anyway as I said Kev could take him.
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haha brilliant
love chris t-t
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I love the fact that someone who goes by the name of "Christ T-T"...
...says "what the fuck?!" when presented with two initials.
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it would be great if
his name really was "Christ T-T", awesome.
Chris T-T is his real name (just the surname shortened to initials) so it's not a stagename. I think he wasn't bothered about the initials 'KK', except it meant he didn't know who the writer was - because he was reading Luke's post (which didn't publish the writers' full names), not the original review.
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