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OMG How FAT has Claire from Steps got (BBC1NowMasterchef)

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by HeartbrokenStar

VERY

HeartbrokenStar | 03 Jul '08, 20:04 | Send note | Report this | Reply

Shes been plumped up to be put in the oven innit

hmmm battery farmed pop stars


shit

and she has lost her hair


oh

wait a sec


I JUST RAN UP THE STAIRS TO MAKE THIS EXACT THREAD!!!

Too slow though.

This is why you're Team James leader.


good work

commrade


Too slow?

Are you as fat as Claire?


blimey

fat hands and all

good work.


H

stood for hyperactive you know. His real name was Ian Watkins and he was also in a band called Lostprophets.


Why the ]:

Can she not be your favourite fatty?


no

i have been brainwashed my 'ok', 'hello' and other appauling publications so that any popstar above a size 6 = ]:

(actually the ]: was at the idea i ever had a favourite member of steps..*sigh*)


i hope the climax of this program

is her polishing this food off.

it'd certainly make her climax


I feel sorry for her husband

Dudes, I'm getting married to that Claire out of Steps!
Awesome, she's well fit!

A year down the line he wonders were it all went wrong....or that dude is a feeder.


maybe she ate him

Or he's in the Mika school of chubbychasers.


Or maybe he fattened her up

so she wouldn't run off with a fitter bloke?


Is feeder

not the right term for those kinds of people?

I must remember to ask that, if I ever meet one in the outside world.


A feeder is someone who makes someone fat

so they can have sex with them. 'Cause they like sex with fatties.


like mika


Will somebody think of the children

too late, she ate them for elevenses.


NEW MUM CLAIRE

NEW MUM CLAIRE
NEW MUM CLAIRE

stop making excuses for her. she's greedy.


^

My sister crapped out a kid a few weeks ago and the weight has fallen off her. Don't blame the kids!


ahhh...

finally the truth behind steps fall from grace

claire ate all the fans


LOL

'this is what you love doing and it shows so much'. hahahaha


Check ouf Wikipedia -

she knocked the sprog out over a year ago (not sure when this was filmed), is a fascist and is going to tour with Steps this year (without H).


THEY JUST WANT MORE JOBS FOR ENGLISH PEOPLE!

why we paying for this lot to come into the country anyway?


YES! She trundles irresistably onwards!

Some quality shouting going on just then too.


behave yourself, she's GORGEOUS.

Slightly overweight yeah, but so what. Women should be closer to than than the waifs most people like. I wouldn't look at a woman who was less than a size 12, often 14 or 16. I think she's still ver attractive.


i wouldn't look at a woman over size 12

we can be each others wingmen


*disclaimer*

this is only 70-80% true


I fluctuate between being 8 stone and just under 8 stone

So "Fatties" are definitely no goes for me.


^^this

but not as extreme

and also cos they're not fit


if this is serious

you are win


i am serious

i can't let myself get even close to a size 10 being tight because i hate it.


same

funny thing is I would never be that critical of anyone other than myself.


OMDZZ! SPENCER MOON!

remember when someone called him gay and he did his wrists in?


and "legendary" actress Vicki Michelle

Since when the fuck has being in Allo Allo bestowed legendary status.


It was a long time ago?

that's the only response I can come up with.


this is stating the obvious

but some extreme barrel scraping going on here


Why do they keep calling her "'Allo, 'Allo actress"?

It's finished! She's not still in it! SHE'S A NOBODY!


Good moaning.

Hahahaha


I was pissing by the door.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


Vegetarian?!

Vegetarians shouldn't be allowed on Masterchef.


he's panicking too much

he's going to have another overdose


there's only one was to find out

someone has to all him gay again


GAY

GAAAAAAY

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Do you think he heard?


She wrote a note to me once

saying "To Elliot, Love Claire x". Now I know it was all just an elaborate ruse to lure me into her house made of McCoys and bacon and put me in a casserole.





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