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a text message from my mother

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by ailsa

"Glad I peed my trousers after my interview not b4 :o"

WHAT. I AM DISTURBED.

discuss disturbing texts from your parents/anyone.

ailsa | 13 May '08, 12:28 | Send note | Report this | Reply

Me and my mother

often ask each other 'are you on crack?' if something is odd/awry.

Such a shame my 15-year-old younger brother actually is.


...

sort of sucks the jollity out of it.


I got the following from a friend yesterday:

"I just had a conversation with a girl at work about her bum hole. As you do. It was a struggle not to get a hard-on! It was also a struggle I didn't win..."

Isn't it great when friends share things with you?


a hard on...

...over bum-holes?

It your friend a scatologist, by any chance? The sort of perv who's gobbles his own shit, and defecates on pedestrians from a balcony?


I've decided not to ask.

Although if he was he'd probably tell me...


my dad's texts are awesome

they're brutal and straight to the point.
e.g.

"yes"

or

"ok"


^ this.

"thanks"
"yup"
"fine"


same :(

I'll send him one which I've signed off with 'LOTS OF LOVE FROM FIONAXXXXXXXXXXXXX' or something, and his reply will just be 'Okay. Fine.'


or..

K

gee, thanks dad


My dad still thinks "lol" means "lots of love"

And signs off all his texts with it.

"How are your exams going? lol"
"The dog's had an accident lol"
"Okay lol"


lol


that's adorable

:D


'your nana's died. lol'

oh thats just an accident waiting to happen!


HAHA

actuaLOL


^ Yep

I get 'Great' and 'Good' a lot


yep this so much

and because hes spanish he still spells mobile "movile".


mine's just learning to text

but is starting with textspeak. Which I loathe and can't understand. It's so flipping impersonal and just what-mother you're 50+ not a teenager so stop it.


My mum spells all her texts properly.

Except for 2, 4, b, things like that. That would probably annoy me if she tried full-on text language.


...

Grndad ded. <3 dun a woopsie. Pie 4 t.


seriously though

sorry to hear it.


:(


My Mum said LOL

the other day, I was like WTF etc


My mum texts me things such as:

CORRR, THOM YORKE'S LOOKING GOOD ON JOOLS HOLLAND, INNE? LOL LUV YOU X

She's great.


creepy one from a boy...

i got this last week;

'hope you got in safe claire. turns out i do fancy you, but if thats a problem just let me know and i'll disappear like some kind of wonderful cloud'

i think said boy forgot i used to date his FLAT MATE

x


'turns out i do fancy you'

that's all kinds of funny.


go on. SPILL


haha

it was along the lines of;

'oh fuck....sorry for being a drunken mess blahblahblah'
die.


i love getting embarassing drunken txts....followed by the inevitable:

'oh shit i'm sorry i was wasted last night'

the funniest ones though.. are when they're clearly twatted.. and saying stuff along the lines of 'i wish i was with you right now..i miss you.. blah blah blah..'

and then i don't reply. and then they freak out and panic, and send another txt saying 'oh sorry that was meant for someone else, my mate who's in NZ and haven't seen her for ages..'

yeah right. cringe.


oh god yes.

one 'friend' of mine claims to have switched off his sent messages.

wah!


aw, that's not creepy

it's cute! a WONDERFUL CLOUD!

seriously, you don't know creepy. i KNOW creepy.


a plague of locusts on anyone

who ends a text with

txt bck


why?

its the only way to attempt to get inconsiderate people to reply quickly to texts


it's kind of pathetic though.

demanding they txt you back. makes me NOT want to txt back, out of spite. bastards.


i don't txt bck

if i don't want to. or can't. or was asleep. or at work. or hate them.

Then, these clingy weirdoes, are [probably thinking] "BUT I SAID TXT BCK, THAT FENTON IS A RIGHT PRICK".

I might end all my texts with 'r u a prk?'


yes

txt bck


ok then

please reply

x


i pretty much am a complete snob about 'txt spk' too.

if anyone has the audacity to 'txt spk' me, i generally get pissed off and won't reply. i don't understand all this abbreviated nonsense. type properly! we all practically get unlimited messages on our phone contracts these days anyways, it's not like we can't afford to lengthen our messages to grammatical accuracy! ARGHHHHHHH


fortunately.

my mum has NO idea how to txt. she can barely figure out the 'call' button.

i see this as a personal convenience.


my mum txt my sis

'have a good night out hope you have fun Spaff Whammers'

As I tought her the words and she loved the sound of them.